The Walking Dead

 

I've recently submerged myself into the current zombie obsession that seems to be sweeping the
nation. Specifically, with a show called The Walking Dead. The Walking Dead follows Rick, a police officer with a raspy voice that increasingly becomes raspier each episode, through the post-apocalyptic zombie infested outskirts of Atlanta. Rick is joined on his quest to not die, by his wife, son, his shady friend Shane, the guy from Boondock Saints, an Asian dude, an old dude, the old dude's hot daughter, and a bunch of other people that don't matter. Oh yeah, also there is a black dude named.......T-Dog. Why his name couldn't be Bill or Steve is beyond me. T-Dog??? Ok, I guess.



Hi, I'm T-Dog

Rick and his crew mercilessly murder zombies while searching for food and shelter. The zombies don't stand a chance against Rick and the gang. They walk to slow and lack lateral movement of any kind. Their heads are soft and basically explode, with one swift roundhouse kick, and their incessant moaning and groaning take away their ability to catch you by surprise, although they somehow manage to sneak up on people constantly. Aside from the zombies, the group also faces a threat, called everybody else. People aren't very trustworthy during the zombie apocalypse apparently, and the gang runs into rival groups and engage in battle. Due to the lack of Television or Internet, the gang often passes the time with long drawn out dialogue sequences, and very little action. By season 3, every minute of screen time is a minute in real life. It's almost like the show "24".  Now, I've never seen 24, but I'm familiar with the concept. By the way, when does Jack Bauer sleep? That's the guys name from the show, right? I mean, are there ever like 3 or 4 episodes in a row where the dude is taking a nap? He's gotta sleep sometime. Needless to say, if you're a fan of the show, then you are aware the season finale is coming up, and shit's about to hit the fan.

Here is a list of characters I hope die in no particular order.

 

Andrea

Equipped with the combination of a bitchy personality and a stupid idiot face, Andrea is easily the top candidate for a good killing. Hopefully by the sword of Mishonne, and hopefully while wearing Carl's stupid hat.

 

The Governor

Not only does the Governor suffer from extreme Kanye West syndrome, but he has also lost an eye as well as his passion for maintaining his cool zombie head aquarium. This dude is getting killed for sure. I kinda hope he gets his other eye poked out first, and then ultimately is killed like 3 episodes later. The way I look at it, he would walk kinda funny... Ya know, because he'd be like, blind or whatever. Then the zombies would just think he's also a zombie, and leave him alone. Then maybe he gets hit by a bus or something. That would be cool, right?

 

 

Tyreese

I actually like this guy. I just want to see him go, to see how quickly he gets replaced by a different black dude. First T-Dog, then Tyreese. Ten bucks, says the next guy is named Tyrone.

Milton



This dude Suuuuuccccckkkkksssss!!!!! The very notion that a guy like this would've survived this long already is pretty ridiculous. He'd likely die of an asthma attack, long before a zombie would make contact with him. This guy is so nerdy that he's the kind of nerd other nerds call a nerd. I hope he dies a hilarious way, like slipping on a banana peel or choking on a banana. As long as a banana is involved, I will be entertained.