This version was different. It starts out with the king getting all butthurt over his wife dying, and as a result, he is caught off guard by an evil army. The king and his troops over power the evil army and all seems to be well in the king's kingdom. Then the king's men find a survivor, a hot blonde chick. Her name was Ravenna and all the king's men agreed that she was nails. The king liked it, so he put a ring on it. Then Ravenna immediately Anna Nicole Smith'ed the king and imposed her own evil will upon the kingdom.
The evil queen Ravenna was played by Charlize Theron, who is basically a monster in this film. Not like the monster she played in the movie "Monster" , but rather a hot monster which I think we can all agree is a more likable monster. Her nemesis, Snow white was played by Kristen Stewart, who is awful. I'm not sure why Hollywood keeps trying to shove her down our throats, but I suspect it has something to do with what she has shoved down her throat. Yes, I am implying that she's blown Hollywood Execs for roles. How else do you explain her over exposure? At least she makes up for being a mediocre actress, with being a 6 on a good day(sarcasm). I'd rather see a 10 in this role. Jennifer Love Hugetits would have been a good choice. Same with the chick who played Katniss in the Hunger Games, or any of the Mean Girls with the exception of Lindsay Lohan. Kristen Stewart looks malnourished and is always making a stupid face. Similar to the one you always saw on the weird goth chick who sat behind you in algebra class. The one you and your buddies agreed has probably sacrificed a goat to Satan at some point in her life. Who wants to see that chick on the big screen?
Snow white is held captive in the Queen's castle, and makes a daring escape after stabbing the queen's brother ( who looked like a gayer David Bowie if that's possible), by Andy Dufresne'ing through the sewers. She winds up in the dark forest which is not a safe place to be. The dark forest is the Detroit of fairy tale locations. She is then saved by the huntsman. The same huntsman who was hired by the queen to catch Snow White, but instead has a sudden change of heart and rescues the princess. They venture out of the dark forest and eventually meet up with the dwarves who take them to the fairy forest. Think, San Francisco but more with more fairies. Then the Queen tricks Snow White into eating the apple and Snow White dies. Everybody gets sad, and she is transported to the Duke's castle with all the people that were driven out of the kingdom by the queen. Snow White is dead for like a day, before the huntsman kisses her and she magically comes back to life. By the way, the hottest Kristen Stewart looked in the whole movie was when she was dead. That says a lot, doesn't it? Anyways, she riles up the group and they prepared to go to war with the queen. Even though winning a battle against the queen seemed highly unlikely. The queen had magic abilities that made David Blaine look like Micheal Scott, and displayed this by unleashing a giant shard of glass man upon the huntsman and his cronies, like she's Rita Repulsive or something. Shard of glass man was tough too. The huntsman being matched up against him was like pairing Sonya against Noob Saibot. It wasn't even fair. If you got all three of those references just now, then you are cool.
Long story short, Snow White kills the queen and then ET's the kingdom back to life. Everyone seems happy at the end, and you're left thinking that she and the huntsman are going to start banging.
Overall I give it a 6 out of 10. Not great, but not terrible. Whatever...
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